Dear Madre,
I got into an argument with a friend of mine at school this week. She asked me what I thought about gay marriage. I said "Well, I'm a Christian, and God says it's a sin. So I'm kind of against it, duh." She said that she was a Christian too and she thought it wasn't fair that some people can't get married just because they're gay. Then she told me she was Lutheran and asked what I was. I said, "I'm a Lutheran too..." Who's right?
Short answer: You are.
Long answer: Many Christians (correctly) identify homosexuality as a sin, but they stop there. It's no wonder that celebrities like Elton John think that Christianity breeds hatred for gays. If someone was just pointing out your sinfulness all day long, you probably wouldn't be very fond of him either.
The Bible is clear, homosexual sex is an unspeakable sin, an abomination. And Jesus taught us that our evil desires are just as sinful as our actions. That pretty much covers the orientation aspect too, doesn't it?
Some say that the Bible only condemns pagan, ritualistic, homosexual activity (i.e., temple prostitution, etc.), like that of Sodom and first-century Rome. While it may be well-argued that the Bible doesn't talk about homosexuality as we understand it today - as an orientation, a lifestyle - it does clearly talk about sexuality in general and the way that God has created marriage to be.
And the Bible doesn't even really talk about homosexuality or heterosexuality per se. When it talks about sexuality, there are two states - married and celibate. Regardless of "orientation" (a rather recent concept), one is either not having sexual relations with anyone, or one is united in marriage, which consists of a husband and a wife, where sexual activity can be enjoyed to its fullest potential of being blessed by God with children from the union.
When God determined that it was not good for man to be alone, He took part of man and made him a companion fit just for him. Woman. Neither man nor woman were created to be alone, but together in marriage, where they may carry out the Creation mandate to "Be fruitful and multiply," through doing those things which are reserved for those who are married (see above). This is the ideal that our Father, in His infinite wisdom and love, created for us.
Unfortunately, we no longer live in Eden. Sin has infested every nook and cranny of this world, our relationships with one another, even the way we think and feel. Homosexuality, or maybe more aptly - struggles with homosexual desire/temptation, is one way God's ideal has been corrupted by sin. We all have a need to love and be loved ("It is not good for man to be alone..."), and our innate sin takes that desire and tempts us to direct it toward people and things that fall short of the way God created it to be.
But what if people can't help it? You can't exactly tell someone, "Don't be gay!" and expect it to work. Some people are just born that way, right? Well, I don't know. Maybe. Does it really matter? We are all born idolaters, thieves, murders, coveters, fornicators...haters and enemies of God. It's called Original Sin. Being born this way doesn't make the pursuit of my sinful desires any less sinful. What it does show, however, is just how much we need to be saved from our sins. Thanks be to God that He has also done just that for us too!
While this world is not the way that God created things to be, this isn't the way that He has left things either. He has sent His Son, Jesus Christ, the second Adam, who lived the perfect, sinless life that none of us ever could. He didn't send us Jesus to show off how great He is or to demonstrate that we can live that way too if we just try hard enough and do what He did. He send us Christ to give us His own righteousness as though we lived His perfect, sinless life. And He took upon Himself each and every one of our sins and sinful desires as though He was the one who committed them. Not only that, but Jesus, the Son of God, suffered and died in our place too, taking the punishment from God that our sins deserve.
In Christ, we have been set free from the bondage to our sins, and our sinful nature has died with Him through Baptism. We are free to live as the redeemed, forgiven, saved people we are in Him. God does not just turn His face from gays and condemn them to a lifetime of misery and rejection on earth and an eternity of suffering in Hell. He sent His Son to die for them, not to live in homosexuality, but to be free of it and its temptations.
Just like He did for you and your sins too.
So yes, homosexuality and gay marriage is a sin. And when we struggle with our sins and fall flat on our face, short of this ideal, there is forgiveness for us in Christ. Jesus died for gays and lesbians too, and won forgiveness for every one their sins.
In Christ,
Madre