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August 24th, 2005

The Porpoise-Driven Church

Posted At: 11:10am by Rev. William M. Cwirla



TOP TEN WAYS TO TELL THAT YOURS IS A PORPOISE-DRIVEN CHURCH


10. Recite parts of the catechism, get a fish
9. Liturgist goes by the name Shamu
8. Baptism by immersion, preaching by immersion, everything by immersion
7. Lots of hoops to jump through before you get fed
6. Sushi pot-lucks
5. Youth group composed entirely of geeky suntanned kids named Sandy and Bud
4. Narthex has sign that reads: "Slippery When Wet"
3. 20,000 gallon salt-water baptismal pool
2. Youth pastor is named Ranger Ricks
1. Sermons consist mostly of incoherent clicks and whistles

*Bonus points for anyone under 40 who gets #2 and 5.
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Comments

Re: The Porpoise-Driven Church

Posted On: August 24th, 2005 at 2:46pm by Petersen [ + ]
Now here I thought this would be some profound Cwirla play on words drawing attention to the fact that the porpoise (dolphin where I come from) is a symbol of the Resurrection or of Sumariners. I can't remember which.

Petersen

Re: The Porpoise-Driven Church

Posted On: August 24th, 2005 at 3:28pm by revcwirla
At Blogosphere, we try to be "profound" on Mondays and Fridays. Wednesdays we are just plain goofy. "Worship, play, work" as we say in Higher Things.

Though the dolphin (Delphinidae) and the porpoise (Phocoenidae) are different species, we are exercising "satiric license" here at Blogosphere, and treat them interchangably.

For a neat article on the Dolphin as a Christian symbol, see the New Advent Encyclopedia (http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/05100a.htm).

Re: The Porpoise-Driven Church

Posted On: August 24th, 2005 at 5:51pm by Rev. Todd Peperkorn [ + ]
Ranger Rick....ah that brings back memories.

Re: The Porpoise-Driven Church

Posted On: August 24th, 2005 at 5:59pm by revcwirla
One of TV's finest hours: http://www.timvp.com/flipper.html

Re: The Porpoise-Driven Church

Posted On: August 24th, 2005 at 9:56pm by FemLem1
Ah! i knew i recognised it! I love that show! [now humming the theme song]

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